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Making friends and influencing people

Smiles sent from a friend :)

I wanted to take the opportunity to talk to you about friends. Those wonderful people who come along and we choose to keep in our lives. Whether they are far away, or we're missing seeing them right now, the fact that we that we want to have them around is surely pretty special.

Everyone has a different approach to friendship. Some people are confident, they make friends easily, and are the glue behind our social groups, while others shy away from the spotlight completely. As for myself, well, I'd put myself somewhere in the middle.

You see, although I confidently liaise with people over emails, social media or through my blog every day, I feel like a jibberish mess in person. I'd much prefer to be doing a presentation to a room full of people than going along to a mum's group in an attempt to make friends. The problem is, I don't have a whole load of invites for presentations right now, so I guess I'm stuck with those groups.

This isn't a new thing for me, I've always been a bit slow at being myself around people, even when I first met my best friend from secondary school I avoided talking to her until forced. As you can imagine it tends to make the whole making friends process take a bit longer. The thing is, with a little person around me all day every day, having company, when we're not on lockdown, is the thing that gets me through (please read my coping with social distancing blog). But that little person isn't all too great at giving me the extra time I need to form any sort of connection with a person.

But why am I telling you all this? Well it's been one of the biggest causes of stress for me since my little man came along just over two years ago. I've had moments where I've cried, been jealous and simply felt unable to change things. But through time I've learn that even the kindness of just one or two people can make such a huge difference.

It only took one understanding mum to completely turn my maternity leave around. That one person listened, understood and invited me into a group of ladies that I will always be thankful for. A group where I've made some incredible friends. I only hope that I can do something similar for someone else struggling one day. So as I sit here now during lockdown, I feel really lucky to have people that I actually miss.

I might not have people I head off to spend the weekend with just yet, I'm terrible at travelling anyway, but the fact that I have people who genuinely care how I'm coping right now makes me feel lucky. You see, one wise person recently reminded me that friendship is not about the quantity of the friends you have, but the quality.

While I can't promise to not stress over friendships again, I know I have some great people in my life who can get me through anything. I really hope that you are lucky enough to have a wonderful friend or two right now as well, someone taking the time out to check on you through these difficult times.

Until next time, keep safe.

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Saturday, 23 October 2021